Pride and Prejudice: Elizabeth's Doubts
by TheTudorRoseQueen
Summary: Elizabeth knows that Darcy loves her and is ready to marry her - but like everyone else, she has her personal doubts. Why is Darcy marrying her? Was marrying her out of obligation to her family? Can she trust that Darcy isn't marrying her out of blindness or can he convince her that he truly loves her? Darcy/Elizabeth pre-wedding


It was a truth generally acknowledged by the townsfolk of Meryton and her family that Elizabeth Bennet truly abhorred Mr. Darcy. Many were astonished once hearing upon the news of her engagement to him. Did Mr. Darcy really marry Elizabeth due to the fact he loved her or chose to recover her family's reputation? Elizabeth knew she and her sisters would have a more arduous chance at finding husbands after the following accounts had occurred. Perhaps Mr. Darcy was blindly taking Miss Bennet to be his betrothed. As Elizabeth and Jane walked to Meryton, they received stares of wonder and they heard whispers going about the air.

Elizabeth held her position firmly, refusing to be intimidated by whatever gossip spread through town that day. Jane grasped gently her sister's hand and lent in to speak.

"Lizzie, they know about Lydia and Mr. Wickham – but I truly do not believe that they think ill towards you or myself."

"Miss Bennet, I heard of your engagement to Mr. Bingley; and yours Miss Bennet to Mr. Darcy. I offer you my congratulations to both. What a thrilling and happy day it must have been for you both!" Miss King tumbled upon the Bennet sisters as she stepped out of Mr. Hennessey's Linen.

Elizabeth and Jane looked surprised at Miss King's compliments, curtsied to the lady and thanked her for her kind words. Shortly, Mrs. King stepped out and called for her daughter, her tone sharp.

"Anne! Come along, we have other business to attend to."

"Of course, Mama, Miss Bennet my regards to your family," Miss King smiled kindly and scurried off.

Jane smiled and glanced at Elizabeth.

"It is good to see a kind face, Lizzie." Jane said, as they entered the linen shop.

Mr. Hennessey's apprentice greeted them and Lizzie stood off to the side waiting patiently for Jane. The Bennet sisters had come to the linen shop to acquire silks for their wedding dresses. Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy had both agreed to new dresses just for the occasion, providing each of the Miss Bennet ladies with means of acquiring their white gowns. Elizabeth watched Jane, her expression full with joy and excitement for the day to come. Her smile faded as Mr. Darcy was thought of. What if Mr. Darcy—

"Lizzie, what is the matter? You look unwell." Jane said, gently.

"What if it was out of impulse Darcy asked me to—," Elizabeth held back tears and Jane embraced her.

"Lizzie, stop. Mr. Darcy loves you. He knows what happened, yet he chose you because he loves you. What happened with Lydia and Wickham has neither swayed his opinion nor his admiration for you." Jane replied, quietly. "You mustn't doubt yourself or Mr. Darcy. I wish to see you happy, Lizzie."

Elizabeth let go a relieved sigh at her sister's words of good judgment. It never ceased to amaze her of Jane's ever present confidence and indisputable optimism. Though Jane once did show such feelings of doubt; after the Netherfield party had left, she always maintained her sweet disposition – no matter what ailed her. She would not allow it to grieve her soul beyond repair. As a sister, she had obligations to the younger to show example. As a daughter, she was there as encouragement to her poor mama and sensibly humored father.

 **Earlier that Morning**

 _Yet with one daughter married and two engaged, both the elder Miss Bennets knew Mrs. Bennet's worries still carried on about her youngest, Mary and Kitty. Mrs. Bennet was certainly aware of her eldest daughters' most advantageous marriages to rich young men but at what cost? Their good family name was irreparable – though Mr. Wickham had married Lydia – the scandal alone nearly cast her out of all good society. Lady Lucas rarely ever did not call since the elopement – nor were they often sent invitations to the country assemblies or dinner parties. It unquestionably vexed Mrs. Bennet – she made her opinions well known at breakfast, crossed at the public snubbing of Lord and Lady Lucas._

 _"Oh, Mr. Bennet – what are we to do? We have been shunned by those whom we once called friends! Perhaps it is a fortunate thing that upon marrying the fine gentlemen, Jane and Lizzie will return to the public face and be welcomed. I do know what those no good, gossiping ladies speak of my daughters and my family, Mr. Bennet. It vexes me to think that anyone should speak so ill of my Jane – and Lizzie of course. If anyone should be shunned it should be Lydia and Mr. Wickham, foolish child – how could she think of ruining our good name? I am undoubtedly aware that Mr. Gardiner spoke to Lydia of her shortcomings and all in good time that we should return to society. But it is causing anguish in me! I hope never to speak to Lady Lucas or have her mock me in such manner again."_

 _Mr. Bennet heaved a sigh and continued to read the morning paper as Mrs. Bennet prattled on._

 _"Well, Mrs. Bennet, it grieves me to hear you say such things for I just received a call this morning from Lord Lucas, inviting us to a small family dinner. Mr. and Mrs. Collins are preparing a visit to the Lucases. They passed the invitation along to both Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley."_

 _"And when were you going to tell me of this?" Mrs. Bennet cried, terribly perplexed._

 _"I sent my reply before breakfast and made known to Lord Lucas that we will welcome the invitation and dine with them a fortnight on the morrow."_

 _"Mr. Bennet!" Mrs. Bennet shrieked._

 _"Mama, it would be a blessing to us that Lord and Lady Lucas invited us to society. It will mend some old wounds." Jane had said that morning at breakfast. "It will do us well to dine with them again. I'm sure Mr. Bingley will be delighted – as will Mr. Darcy."_

Later that afternoon once Jane and Elizabeth returned from Meryton – Elizabeth stepped out into the garden – smiling as she saw Mr. Darcy walking towards Longbourn from Netherfield. He removed his hat and bowed quickly before placing a gentle kiss on the back of her hand.

"Mr. Darcy,"

"Elizabeth," he said. "Were you and your sister able to find the linen needed for the gowns?"

She touched his arms and looked down, afraid to admit to him the worries in her heart.

"Elizabeth?"

"Why are you choosing me as your wife, Darcy?" she asked, softly. "After all that has happened—I have nothing—my family's reputation—,"

"Look at me, Elizabeth." Darcy exclaimed, grasping her shoulders lightly. She did. "None of that matters to me. I know in my heart it is you who I desire to marry. I thought I knew what love really was – that it could be sealed and contained with logic. For months it agitated me, like a dull blade poking and prodding about in the dark. When I saw you the night of the assembly dance at Lucas Lodge, it bewildered me what a strong, amiable woman you were."

Elizabeth smiled, laughing lightly, remembering the night of the dance.

"If I remember correctly you spoke to Mr. Bingley that night after his efforts to encourage you to dance. You said, ' _she is tolerable I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me._ '"

Darcy inwardly winced at his own words. It was true; he had thought her barely tolerable once. However, the more he saw of Elizabeth Bennet, the more enraptured he became of her beauty and her character. She was quick, witty, good humored though stubborn at times – she had admirable temperament about her.

"I was blind. The more I saw you – the more I heard you speak, I found myself ensnared by you, unable and unwilling to release my heart from yours. I would not have it another way, Elizabeth Bennet. I love you and do not wish for you to doubt me. Do not doubt me. Know that my heart is true."

"As is mine," said Elizabeth, as Darcy kissed her. _As is mine, Darcy._


End file.
